Yes, I Am, I Am Awkward

In my newspaper class we spend time talking about cool items that could be in the newspaper. Since it is a small class, I like to get to know my students even more than I get a chance to know them in my bigger classes. As we were talking today, I told them that I am an awkward person. You know the kind that responds with “Green” when someone asks how your day is going. Yes, I am that awkward. One of the students looked at me and said, “There is no way you are awkward.” I told them I truly was and they still didn’t believe me. So a couple of things came of this. One, I am glad that I can be something to my students. I was too fearful and too unsure to push myself to chase my dreams or to step outside of my box. So I now use this experience as an opportunity to push my students to 1) Be true to who they are. 2) Step out of their box and live those dreams. I have no qualms with telling my students who I am because I want them to know that no matter their struggles they can rise above and become who they want.

However, with this student questioning my awkwardness I started to question it for a bit. Am I really just socially inept? So I played around with the word awkward to see what all I could come up with and you guessed it, I came up with some pretty good quotes. One of my favorites, “The awkward moment when the awkward moment you thought was awkward wasn’t really awkward and you created an awkward moment by thinking that a non-awkward moment was actually awkward and now is awkward.” That’s a lot, but fitting because it fits my overthinking everything mentality. By the way, author is unknown as far as I could tell. The next quote I laughed at was “I don’t need to flirt; let me seduce you with my awkwardness.” ~ Janet Gwen I laugh at this one because I might actually be the worst flirt in the world. And finally, one that I am going to get made into a shirt is, “Hi, I’m awkward.” Now that probably leaves you asking, “Why would she be celebrating in her awkwardness? Well, I ask you, “Why not?”

I think the fact that I have always been awkward has held me back because I was so convinced that something was wrong with me. Instead of loving everything about me, I have chosen to pick myself apart. Instead of embracing my awkwardness and laughing at my silliness, I overthought every situation I was in, or even worse, I would overthink situations that might happen. I feel by recognizing who I am, awkwardness and all, will only help me with my growth, and if you’ve read my earlier blogs you know that my personal growth is my focus right now. So I will end this with another quote I found and it just simply says, “It’s weird not to be weird.” In the end, the only way you can grow is to be YOU. So embrace and love all of you.

I think the fact that I have always been awkward has held me back because I was so convinced that something was wrong with me. Instead of loving everything about me, I have chosen to pick myself apart. Instead of embracing my awkwardness and laughing at my silliness, I overthought every situation I was in, or even worse, I would overthink situations that might happen. I feel by recognizing who I am, awkwardness and all, will only help me with my growth, and if you’ve read my earlier blogs you know that my personal growth is my focus right now. So I will end this with another quote I found and it just simply says, “It’s weird not to be weird.” In the end, the only way you can grow is to be YOU. So embrace and love all of you.

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